I handed the crumpled piece of notebook paper to my first-grade teacher. It wasn’t homework or an assignment. It was just something I wrote, while sitting in the rumble seat of my parent’s Buick station wagon. “Oh my God; this is a poem”, she said. Something about the lightness of day and the darkness of night. She took me by the hand and escorted me to the principal’s office. They read it over the intercom.
In third grade, I was interviewed about an article I wrote on the school’s CCTV. I was shaking like a leaf, but I remember holding it together. I don’t think I fooled anyone, as the interviewer actually said, “You’re not nervous at all, are you?”
Pretty sure that was sarcasm.
For sixth grade graduation, I was asked to give a speech in front of everyone: students, teachers, parents, relatives, etc. It was very formal; suits and ties, dresses and flowers. I gave the speech, right after I vomited.
I was an introvert. So much so, I used to actually read the dictionary. In seventh grade, I was excited to get a used set of encyclopedias.
At Temple University, my English professor asked me to change my major to English. Nah, I’m good.
Two years later, my public speaking teacher tried to talk me into switching my major to communications. No thanks.
I never pursued writing or speaking. Today, mostly what I do is write, speak, and present. It’s not even what I do, but it ended up being what I do.
All my life, the Universe was talking to me, trying to tell me something. I wasn’t listening. I’m not sure if I purposefully ignored it or that I’m really bad with hints. I am, by the way. Bad with hints. If you want to make me see something, grab me by the face with both hands and tell me.
They say the Universe gives hints, like in a recurring dream, Déjà vu, a sequence of numbers, or a book falls off the shelf in front of you at the bookstore. But for me, it was grabbing me by the face and I responded by putting the metaphorical book back on the shelf and moved on.
Yeah, sometimes I need to be shaken.
The practice of yoga is opening my awareness to these hints and signs. I’m becoming more aware of the universe. I say universe, but call it what you want: reality, life, God, guardian angel, or maybe Karma, whatever. We all get this communication and many of us don’t recognize it.
If you ever got the feeling that something is trying to tell you something, yeah … it probably is. Be aware.
Photo by Mohammad Metri on Unsplash